Why am I writing this?

I have known many, many people who have had their dogs die from cancer. In many cases, the cancer was too far advanced to treat. Of those who did treat, you don't know the details of what they went through. It sounds quite simple when summarized with 'we went though chemo and he lived 2 years'. There is a whole lot more emotion and decisions to be made. Treatment is not always simple.

This blog is my own personal experience. Some days are filled with frustration, others are filled with laughter. If anyone is offended, I can't apologize for my emotions. I typed what I felt at the time. It does not mean I feel the same today. If you want clarification, just ask. No matter my frustrations, I know my vet and oncologist are doing a fantastic job of caring for Arri. He just is not co-operating by being a 'typical' case.

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

May 22, 2012: Amputation day 1


9am, taking Oregon for his vaccine and getting Glamis weighed.  We are celebrating!!!  Glamis is now just 2lbs away from his goal weight.  Nine months ago, G weighed 109 lbs.  Today he was 82.3.  On the way home from the vet, we get the call from the surgeon that Arri can come home.  We arrange pick up for 12:30.

When I arrive, they put me in the comfort room.  We go over the surgery, medication, restrictions and post surgical care.  Arri will get Tramadol and Deramaxx for pain.  He has no stapes or sutures.  I am to watch for swelling and discharge.  There is some bruising.  I am to use a hot pack (dry heat) on the incision about every 6 hours. Considering the significance of the surgery, there is very little I need to do but let him rest and heal.   In answer to my question about the lymph node, it was sent for biopsy as a precaution.  That is a load of worry off my shoulders.  Time to bring Arri in.

I hear his toenails on the tile and it makes me smile.  When he enters the room, there is no excitement to see me, no tail wags.  The boy is stoned.  Unaware I am in the room.  He lays on the carpet and I get a look at the wound.  I can't explain what I was picturing but reality is different from what I thought.  Not nearly the bruising she prepared me for.  I thought it would be worse.  There was also less leg than I expected.  I pictured a good portion of the thigh remaining.    Maybe when the fur grows back it will look more like I thought.  Speaking of fur, he has an interesting hair cut.  We just sit for a bit absorbing the change.  Doing all the research and preparing myself for the moment has helped tremendously.  When I see him it is more like seeing someone with long hair chop it off into a pixie.  It is different and will take some getting used to. 

Next is the hard part; getting him to the car.  I don’t know how to use the sling yet.  Yes it is basic but how much pressure is too much.  He is not excited for the walk.  He could care less if we ever make it to the car.  I can’t be in front of him luring him while holding the sling in a good place.  So we hop once or twice and sit.  Hop and sit.  We get to the van and I just stare at the opening.  This is going to be interesting.  I can lift him but he does not like that, never has.  If I put his front legs in, his back is really too weak to hop.  At this point I am not sure how I did it but either way, he was in. 

The trip home was quiet.  No crying, panting, coughing.  It was nice not to be stressed the whole trip home.  We stopped one time and I pulled Arri out of the van.  I pulled his front legs to the edge and let him slide forward.   Now, you have to understand that I drag my dogs from the time they are little puppies.  They will lay on the floor and I will grab two legs and spin them around.  This usually happens during toe nail trimming.  If I am taking photos and I want them in a certain place, I will drag them there.  It is easier than trying to get him to move 4 inches.  They trust me in doing this and never fight it.  While he was sliding I lifted on the sling and handled the back end.  It wasn’t graceful but it did the trick.  A couple of hops with help to the grass and I dropped the sling.  He sat, then stood and took 3 hops and peed.  I was so excited.  A little rest and back into the van.

When we arrived home, I parked right at the edge of the grass so Arri would have a soft spot to land.  His confidence is shaky so we do a lot of stop and start.  He moved around a bit and peed again.  Since it was dog dinner time, we tried to encourage him into the house.  He just stood.  I let him take it at his pace.  Next thing I know, he is hopping away from the house.  He goes about 15 feet and squats to poop.  That about knocked my socks off.  He did it with no assistance.  Ok, I know it isn’t a miracle.  It is just that most literature talks about constipation and concerns about toileting.  In going through all this, I should know that Arri plays by his own rules.

We introduce the other dogs one at a time.  Tim had laid out the carpet remnant on the kitchen tile for traction.  Arri is just laying there.  First up is Glamis.  He comes pouncing out in happiness, gives Arri and sniff and moves on.  Next up is Summer.  Her reaction is fairly similar.  Finally it is Oregon.  He pounces on Arri’s head and starts licking his face.  Then he works his way back to the incision and gets a little too nosey.  Arri does not complain but I make him back off.  That went well.

Dinner is a special treat of canned food.  The doctors said this was not necessary but I could if I wanted.  I wanted, so I did.  I put the food between his feet and let him eat laying down.  By next week, he will be at the elevated food bowl again.

I can tell he wants to move but is unsure of himself.  At the same time, he doesn’t like the sling too much.  He is doing a bit of grunting like there is discomfort.  I just need to wait him out.  He will relax when he is ready.  He moves himself in front of the door to watch out the window.  Summer and Oregon go outside but he does not want to.  When Summer comes back in the house, she steps right on Arri’s incision.  I about died.  She found herself 5 feet away from Arri and wasn’t sure how she got there.  I know how but I’m not telling.

Arri was finally motivated to go out.  It is a bit of a walk from the front door to the grass so he toileted as soon as he reached the grass.  While he rested up, Summer and Oregon wrestled in the yard.  Getting in and out of the doorway is difficult.  We will figure it out with more practice. 

At this point I think we are in for the night.  I leave Arri to rest in the living room and go into the office to play on the computer.  About 4 minutes later, I hear him.  He is working his way down the hall (need to buy a temporary runner).  He loses his footing ¾ of the way to me. I let him lay for a few minutes but I know he can’t get up.  The floor is wood and too slippery to get his back leg up.  I grab his front legs and drag him to the carpet.  He gets his legs under him and finishes up the walk to where he wants to plant himself for a while.

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